Archive for June 2010

The Neediness Curse

If you ever want to turn a woman OFF quickly, there’s no better way than to start being needy.

I have a real life example I’d like to share:

My sister’s best friend is a VERY attractive woman in her late 30’s.  She’s currently divorced and is basically, back in the dating scene.  Anyway, she recently went on a trip to the East coast to visit her father who is ill and in the hospital.

As it happens, she met a young guy who was one of the medics there.  They REALLY hit it off and immediately decided to start dating.

Now, the two of them live on opposite sides of the country but they didn’t care about that at the time.  So, once this woman came home from her trip, she gets a phone call from the young guy who says he’s coming out to visit her.  (Normally not a big deal, but…. this guy had NO other reason for going across the country except to see a woman he just met.)

Around this time my Sister invites me over for dinner to see her friend’s new “Boyfriend.”  I came over and she told me about how he is just here for a visit and will be going back home in a few days.  I met him.  He was cool and I noticed he tended to follow his new flame around constantly wanting to be affectionate with her.

It was at this time, and upon learning that he flew across the country to see a woman he just met, that I said to myself, “This is NOT going to happen!  They’ll split up in less than a month.”

So, I recently just got back from a visit to my Sister’s and asked her how it’s going with them.  She told me that her friend thinks he’s nice, BUT he’s a little too needy… AND she’s no longer returning his calls and texts.

How did I know?  How did I call it??

Well, I’ve made that very same mistake myself.  Not only the neediness thing, but I once flew down to see a woman I just met in my hometown.  She KNEW I was coming down ONLY TO SEE HER.

What happened??

Once I got down there, she didn’t return my calls!

What’s going on here?  Simply put, women are totally and completely TURNED OFF by needy behavior.

Why?  Because it shows a lack of confidence!

And, what is the ONE thing women find most sexy in a guy?

Confidence!

So, the lesson here is, do NOT become needy and obsessed upon meeting a HOT girl!  If you want to visit her, HAVE ANOTHER REASON FOR GOING TO HER AREA!

Call her up and say:

“Hey, you know –  I’m going to be in your neck of the woods next week because I have to (visit a friend/attend a seminar/go there for work) and why don’t I give you a call while I’m over there and maybe we’ll meet for a drink?”

It conveys confidence and shows you have other things going on besides trying to meet up with her.

All VERY important stuff!

Remember, neediness KILLS attraction.

Confidence AMPLIFIES it.

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